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Imago Relationship Therapy

Pre-Marital - Marriage Enrichment - Divorce Prevention

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Dr. Janet Greenwoods
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The Relationship Turnaround
"I DO" an Imago
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Bring Your Baby Home -
How to Prevent Post-Partum Blues
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Recovering from Infidelity
 
 

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ACA Marriage
Anger and Rage
Argue Less
Assertiveness
Avoiding Ruts
Beyond the Honeymoon
Constructive Arguing
Differing Sexual Appetites
Increasing Communication
Intentional Joy
Intimacy Checkup
Lies in Marriage
Listening
Nagging
Nurturing a Marriage
Overachieving Husband
Parent-Child Communication
Parenting Differences
Power Struggle
Quality Time with Children
Religious Differences
Respect
Sharing Feelings
Superwoman Stress
Teen Parent Relationships
Time Expectations
Understanding vs Agreement
Working Wife

 

Parenting Differences

 Q: My husband and I disagree about the use of money to encourage our children to get good grades. I think bribing children with money takes away from their natural desire to learn.  Do you have an opinion on this?

A: A bribe is compensation for something dishonest or illegal, while a reward is a tangible form of appreciation for something worthwhile. There is a big difference between these two!

      It is not a bribe to give an Oscar for an outstanding actor or actress, or to award an athletic letter, scholarship or weekly salary.  These provide recognition for a job well done or excellent performance.

      Studies on incentive motivation show that human beings work harder, better, and achieve more if they receive either social praise or material goods.  It is important to give your child a role in deciding on a reward for a specific behavior.

      Negotiating the expectations and rewards together will ensure that the reward has meaning and therefore will be a motivation.  You may find that other things or privileges are more of a reward for your children than money.  Talk it over with them.